The Lord of the Rings & Hobbit MASH

Alright my fellow adventurers, time for a blast from the past with one of my all-time favorite games…MASH! That’s right, the future-predicting phenomenon that has foretold the numerous men I am going to marry…you know, one day (though as of now I have currently married none of them, but I live for hope lol), as well as the awesome exotic locales I’m going to call home (again, nothing to show for all this oracular knowledge but I have faith) and pretty much everything in-between. I don’t know if you guys played this in school but this was the one that has stuck with me over the years and I have taught it to not only my younger brother but pretty much every younger cousin of mine as well as any friend I’ve ever had. So I figure it’s time that I bring that wonderful, suspenseful, and miraculous game to you! Now the rules may vary depending on who you’re with, their playing preferences, and just how evil and vindictive they want to be that day, but I’m going to keep it simple. Each category gets three slots to be filled in with answers of your choice and we’ll work from there.


Now as great as this game is normally, my brother and I amped it up a notch (due to sheer boredom) and now we’ve created our own themed versions, including Harry Potter, The Tudors, Star Wars, X-Men, Disney, Pretty Much Anything We Want At The Moment, and of course, The Lord of the Rings/Hobbit! And today, I’m thinking what better than delving into an epic adventure in Middle Earth itself?!

Photo via:Éomer

Right off the bat (though you’ll see it lower on the list here, but I’m changing a few things to make it easier for us to play), choose Up or Down and pick a number between 1 and 20. That number is your Tally number. Now I choose Down and my Tally is 15, so I’m going to start from the highest option and count down, repeating the tiers until I hit 15. Whatever option I’m on when I hit 15, that’s my future! (These are just my answers so make sure you write down your own as we go along!)

Lord of the Rings and Hobbit MASH

M = Mordor
A = Angmar
S = Shire
H = Helm’s Deep

1) Fili
2) Faramir
3) Eomer

Mode of Transportation:
1) Bill the pony
2) Rustobel Rabbits
3) Lothlorien Boats

1) White
2) Green
3) Silver

Journey Beginning:
1) Rohan
2) The Shire
3) Rivendell

Journey’s End:
1) Grey Havens
2) Gondor
3) Dale (pre Smaug)

1) Sting
2) Wizard’s Staff
3) Gimli’s Battle Axe

1) Shield Maiden
2) Herbalist
3) Queen

1)Woman of Rohan
2) Rivendell Elf
3) Hobbit

1) Sauron
2) Sarumon
3) Witch King of Angmar

1) Gandalf the grey
2) Galadriel
3) Aragorn

1) Combat Ram
2) Misty Mountain Ravens
3) Brego the horse

Wizard or High Elf of Choice:
1) Radagast the Brown
2) Gandalf the Grey
3) Galadriel

1) Aid the Fellowship
2) Rescue Merry and Pippin
3) Escape from Mirkwood

1) Old and Happy
2) Grey Havens
3) Die saving Middle Earth



Alright guys, let’s count down…




I got all the third options! Oh, there’s some great choices here, so let’s see… that means I’m going to marry Eomer (hells yeah) and travel exclusively by silver Lothlorien boats (I feel fancy already!), and my journey will begin in Rivendell and end in the lovely town of Dale (PRE-SMAUG!!!). My weapon of choice is going to be Gimli’s battle axe, and my occupation is Queen so I figure we’re right on track here (I look absolutely AMAZING in a crown), and I’m going to be a Hobbit! My nemesis is the Witch King of Angmar himself and my ally is Aragorn – who I’m thinking may not be the best for this particular foe, but hey I’m willing to give it a chance. My animal ally is Brego the Rohan war horse and I’m great personal friends with Galadriel, the Lady of Light herself — maybe that’s where I get the Lothlorien boats from! It never hurts having friends in high places! And let’s see, my quest is to escape from Mirkwood Forest (damn, where’s Bilbo when I need him?!) and I ultimately die trying to save Middle Earth. Dammit Aragorn, did you get me killed while fighting the Witch King in Mirkwood Forest?! Ah well, you win some you lose some. I’m going to be fabulously wealthy – which makes since I suppose since I am a Queen – and I’m also beautiful – not that that matters considering I am so clearly awesome. And Eomer and I call the Shire home, so I wonder if that makes me Queen of the Hobbits or if we just summer there when we get tired of Rohan? Either way, I call it a damn fine life!

Photo via:

Make sure you tell me in the comments what the future holds for you my fellow adventurers! What daring deeds will you do, what friends and enemies will you have? Play the game and find out! And a big thank you to J.R.R. Tolkien for writing such an AMAZING work of art!!!

And be sure to check out the Harry Potter version of this game on my other blog channel Moonstonemaiden!